Film Review: HOMER AND EDDIE (1989, Andrei Konchalovsky)

Stars: 2.2 of 5.
Running Time: 102 minutes.
Notable Cast or Crew: James Belushi, Whoopi Goldberg, John Waters (director of PINK FLAMINGOS and SERIAL MOM), Anne Ramsey (THE GOONIES, DEADLY FRIEND), Mickey Jones (TOTAL RECALL, EXTREME PREJUDICE), Karen Black (FIVE EASY PIECES, INVADERS FROM MARS), Vincent Schiavelli (ONE FLEW OVER THE CUCKOO'S NEST, LORD OF ILLUSIONS), Tracey Walter (REPO MAN, MORTUARY ACADEMY), 'Tiny' Lister (EXTREME PREJUDICE, JACKIE BROWN), Pruitt Taylor Vince (NATURAL BORN KILLERS, WILD AT HEART), Wayne Grace (DANCES WITH WOLVES, MULHOLLAND DR.), Robert Glaudini (CUTTING CLASS; GRUNT! THE WRESTLING MOVIE).
Tag-line: "She's ruthless - He's witless - They're on the road together and falling apart at the seams!"
Best one-liner: "What the fuck is a brain stem?"

Sometimes when I can't tell if a film is supposed to be a comedy or a drama, and James Belushi happens to be in it, all I have to do is look at his credit: if it says 'Jim' (SNOW DOGS, CANADIAN BACON, ABRAXIS: GUARDIAN OF THE UNIVERSE, JUMPIN' JACK FLASH) it's probably intended to be a comedy, and if it says 'James' (SALVADOR, WILD PALMS, THIEF), it probably means that he wants to be taken seriously. HOMER AND EDDIE is a film which pendulates wildly between the full on-whacky and the quasi-profound, but for the record, he's credited as 'James.'

A lot of 70's and 80's movies struggle to maintain a consistent tone (INTO THE NIGHT, THE END, FREEBIE AND THE BEAN, SOMETHING WILD, HOWARD THE DUCK, and STROKER ACE come to mind), establishing themselves as Zany with a capital Z, and then pulling the rug out with something that's Heavy with a capital H. It's not to say that this will derail an entire film, or that tonal shifts can't be done well (see the Coens, David Lynch, et al.), but it's possible that two disparate tones have never been quite so at odds with one another as is the case in HOMER AND EDDIE. For example, we follow up a disquieting scene with a terminally ill woman smashing her head into a bathroom mirror...

...with one that involves hootin' n' hollerin' whilst driving past a bus full of nubile cheerleaders while set to peppy 80' grooves. A serious theological discussion that ends with Whoopi screaming, in all seriousness, "THERE AIN'T NO FUCKING GOD!" is followed by a fix-em-up montage set to tender guitar and wailin', sultry saxophone.

Directed by the writer of IVAN'S CHILDHOOD and ANDREI RUBLEV (!) and Cannon Films director-in-residence (RUNAWAY TRAIN, MARIA'S LOVERS, SHY PEOPLE) Andrei Konchalovsky, HOMER AND EDDIE is the tale of a brain-damaged man-child (James Belushi) and a brain-tumored sociopath (Whoopi Goldberg) who join forces and go on a West Coast road trip in search of the meaning of life, the meaning of family, and a missing eighty-seven dollars.

In short, it's a coming of age drama, a zany buddy-trip flick, an on-the-lam crime thriller, a fish out of water story, a Depression-era throwback (that's kind of a 1980's OF MICE AND MEN), a sex farce, and a cult movie. It's like somebody thought that combining RAIN MAN, SOMETHING WILD, and PEE-WEE'S BIG ADVENTURE would in some way be a good idea.
[The only movies of the era I can think of which can properly pull off the Americana road trip scenario along with flashes of beauty and violence and comedy and pathos are Jim Jarmusch's MYSTERY TRAIN and David Lynch's WILD AT HEART.]

Our leads do a pretty good job of 'running it up the flagpole,' so to speak. Belushi tries his hardest to pull off 'lovable, mentally disabled man.' The fact that I didn't find it entirely offensive is a tremendous credit to Belushi's acting chops.

I became something of a latter-day Whoopi fan only after seeing her performance in FATAL BEAUTY, and she's pretty amusing here, rampaging about and robbing people and uttering rejoinders such as "You're like Frankenstein and shit!" She anchors the erratic and ridiculous character with enough humanity that I was never actively pissed at her, and again, that is something of an achievement. You know a film is not hitting it's mark when I have to compliment it in terms 'what was not actively aggravating me.'

When you'd fear that all hope is lost- in a twist that really blew my mind– there's a goddamned parade of iconic cult actors in bit parts. Just look at this rogue's gallery:

Michael Ironside's best bud and ex-Bob-Dylan-drummer Mickey Jones as a redneck manhandled by Whoopi in a diner:


Legendary melancholy-faced character actor Vincent Schiavelli as a priest who refuses to grant Whoopi absolution for murder:


Former wrestler and action film standby Tommy 'Tiny' Lister as a heat-packin' clubgoer begrudingly won over by Belushi's cutesyness:


Crabby acting icon Anne Ramsey as a grizzled convenience store owner keeping an eagle eye out for shoplifters:


70's giant Karen Black as the insane madam of a low-rent, Southwestern, tin-shed whorehouse:


Pruitt Taylor Vince as an unlucky liquor store owner:


Director John Waters as a thieving, flaming highwayman who declares "Move it, maggot!":


And cult actor extraordinaire Tracey Walter as a stuttering cop and boyhood friend of Belushi.


Whew! In closing, I still like Konchalovsky. RUNAWAY TRAIN remains an all-time favorite, and HOMER AND EDDIE is by no means a terrible film, it's merely a misguided one. Probably the most inspired bit of work done on the film is by sometime Golan-Globus and Full Moon Pictures casting director Robert MacDonald (BARFLY, MURPHY'S LAW, RUNAWAY TRAIN, AMERICAN NINJA, TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE 2, THE PIT AND THE PENDULUM, SUBSPECIES, CASTLE FREAK, TRANCERS II) who assembled enough eclectic performers and bizarro cameos to really keep things interesting, even if it was something along the lines of 'What notorious cult performer will pop up next?!'

For its status as a (misconceived) labor of love and a treasure trove of unexpected personalities: a little over two stars.

-Sean Gill

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An Evening with Golan & Globus

Devotees of this site have long heard me pontificate upon the Cannon films of Golan and Globus, and recently, you've probably heard me prattling about the Cannon Films Canon at Lincoln Center, which I was lucky enough to attend on the weekend of November 19th. Said weekend involved the screening of many a Cannon gem (with the selection of arthouse films overshadowing the zanier flicks of the catalog). In my recent review of BARFLY, I wrote a bit about the post-screening Q&A, which involved Barbet Schroeder, Tom Luddy, Yoram Globus, and Menahem Golan. The next day, I was privy to a double-feature of RUNAWAY TRAIN and THE APPLE which included an hour-long discussion between Golan and Globus, and a sort of disco-themed afterparty whereupon these titans of cinema (and APPLE star Catherine Mary Stewart) were assailed by drunken blowhards and die-hard fans alike as the thrumpin' sounds of ABBA eschewed all traditional audibility. In short, it was pretty fantastic. So I thought I'd write up some of the more compelling moments of the evening and share them with the Cannon fans of the world. (And see the end of the BARFLY review as a sort of 'Part 1' to this article).

Even though I'd seen it before, RUNAWAY TRAIN is something to behold on the big screen- scraping steel, snowy vistas, blood and oil and grease and steam. The sheer, absolutely brutish intensity of Jon Voigt and John P. Ryan is mind-blowing- we see men become animals, we see animals become men. The unexpected touches of comedy are even better with a crowd, too- from insults about "your momma's farthole" to the swishy, hot-pants-wearing prison boxing ring cheerleader to John P. Ryan dunking a man's head in the toilet and telling him to "clean the piss off your face!" After the screening, Golan & Globus revealed that it is their favorite of all their films, and began a moderated discussion which jumped to and fro, from the serious to the absurd to the sublime. Since there was no true direction to the chat, I'll tackle random, salient points.

Golan (left) and Globus (right) during Cannon's heyday.

On Andrei Konchalovsky (Cannon alumni- MARIA'S LOVERS, RUNAWAY TRAIN, SHY PEOPLE):
–Golan said he was always demanding costly shots that ended up eating up significant amounts of the total budget, but then weren't used by Konchalovsky in his final cuts! These included a life-size electric whale on SHY PEOPLE and a barnburnin' flyby under a bridge in MARIA'S LOVERS. But despite some difficulties and even a helicopter crash on RUNAWAY TRAIN, Golan & Globus still sit in breathless amazement at the aerial shots Konchalovsky managed to capture. Golan: "I worry about this train in every shot– how did they do it?!"

On Tobe Hooper (Cannon alumni- TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE 2, INVADERS FROM MARS, LIFEFORCE):
–They had nice things to say about Tobe, bragged about the technical achievements of LIFEFORCE, and Golan said that he was 'too scared' to ever watch TEXAS CHAINSAW 2 in its entirety!

On John Cassavetes (Cannon alumni- LOVE STREAMS):
–They had troubles with his first cut of LOVE STREAMS. It didn't quite flow right, and felt a little long. They asked John if perhaps he could lose about 15 minutes. Instead, John added 40, insisting that "it doesn't matter because now it feels shorter." Of course, being relentlessly pro-director producers (even to the point of their own detriment, on occasion), they released the 141 minute long cut.

On Golan's ENTER THE NINJA:
–They bragged about the $1.5 budget, and Globus proudly proclaimed that "Menahem invented the ninja movie!"

On BREAKIN':
– Golan: "I was on the beach in Venice and I saw the black people doing a dance I have never seen before...and so we made BREAKIN'." Golan explained that he brought the finished print to MGM, who was to distribute the film in the U.S. MGM brass watched the film in disgust, claiming it was a "schwarze movie only for the blacks." Golan defended it with that patented Cannon moxie, and demanded another screening- this time with an audience of real people plucked from the streets, not just MGM stuffed shirts. Cannon secretly recruited street dancers for the screening who, once the film had begun, erupted into impromptu windmills, applejacks, kip-ups and worms in the aisles, wowing the excutives and giving Cannon the greenlight!

Globus on Golan (the two haven't been seen together in 20 years!):
–"There is no greater storyteller than Menahem."
–"He is a Globus, he betrayed and became a Golan!" (Menahem changed his name to Golan for patriotic reasons while in the Israeli air force in the late 40's.)
–"The best salesman in the world."

On their youthful days:
–Golan and Globus always loved movies, ever since they were children, but Globus never had any aspirations to actually making them- he just wanted to watch them (he worked as a projectionist in high school). Golan had some grand plans and instructed Globus to go to business school and return, and then they'd take the world by storm– and indeed they did!

On Chuck Norris:
–Golan: "We signed him to a seven-year contract. It was like the golden days of Hollywood."

On Charles Bronson:
–Golan: "He hated the press appearances and the PR"- but they made him do 'em anyway! –Golan: "I wouldn't say that he was a theater actor. On the screen sort of like a great fish." [I have no idea what this means, if I misheard Golan, or if perhaps in some roundabout way he meant to compare Bronson's squint and facial hair to that of a catfish?]

On THE APPLE:
–There was some amazing bickering between G & G about the exact budget of THE APPLE, they finally decided that it cost $5 million.
–On a serious note, Globus told the following story as Golan solemnly nodded in concurrence: at an early screening of THE APPLE in Montreal, the French-Canadian crowd booed the film throughout. After the screening, Golan was nowhere to be found– he was discovered on the roof of his hotel, contemplating suicide. He spoke with Globus, and came down soon after. At this point, Golan commented to us all: "Not everybody likes the movie." [Who could have forseen that thirty years later, he'd be presiding over a screening in New York City packed with psychotic, BIM-marked APPLE die-hards?]

On directorial freedom:
–Golan believed in complete artistic freedom, Globus, generally speaking, did not. On MASTERS OF THE UNIVERSE, spiraling out-of-control budgets and weak dailies made Globus want to fire director Gary Goddard. Golan refused ("I have never fired a director."). Of course, the film ended up being a terrible flop and another nail in Cannon's coffin, but Golan still stands by the decision.

On television in Europe:
–Golan: "At any moment, any day, any time of day, you can flip the channels and find playing a Cannon film!"

On 'will they ever work together again?':
–Golan revealed that he's trying to pitch to Globus a new project, and perhaps, one day soon, we will see a new movie emblazoned with that glorious "Golan-Globus" banner! Globus sort of half-smiled and, while not ruling anything out, clarified that to say anything would be premature. Golan proceeded to explain that it would be a simple New York City story called THE SNIPER. Or possibly a romantic comedy called I LOVE MY WIFE.

On Jean-Claude Van Damme:
–Golan: "I discovered the bastard." Apparently Golan was eating at a Los Angeles restaurant when a young waiter, carrying three bowls of soup on a tray approached him. 'Are you Menahem Golan, the producer?' the young Belgian asked. 'Yes, I am,' Golan replied- whereupon young Van Damme spun his leg above his head without spilling a drop of the soup. Impressed with the limber limbs of the Muscles from Brussels, Van Damme appeared as an extra in Cannon films like BREAKIN' and MISSING IN ACTION, and later got his chance to star in BLOODSPORT, KICKBOXER, and CYBORG. Golan added that Van Damme took an interest in post-production and worked uncredited on BLOODSPORT and CYBORG as a co-editor!

On pre-selling (the process of getting funding for a screenplay before there even is a screenplay- sometimes it's just a few words scrawled on a napkin):
–Golan: "We invented pre-selling!"

On Stallone:
–Golan: "Ah, the arm-wrestling script. Sly demanded the highest salary in Hollywood. We asked around, what they were paying him. It was six million a movie. So we offered him ten. He did it. Once you're that big, you're working only for money. So we could snap him up to do our movie."
–Golan: "He had a fear of being kidnapped. His home had sixteen guards and seven dogs."
–Golan: "He was so scared of his wife. What was her name?" [someone yells out Brigitte Nielsen] Yes. She comes to the hotel where we are shooting. 'Where is Sly?' she is asking. Sly comes to my room and asks me to hide him from her. So I did."

On Sharon Stone:
–Golan: "Sharon Stone is our discovery. She was a nobody before us." [One must understand that the demeanor and delivery of the preceding statement somehow nullified any pomposity.]

On cutting costs:
–They invented the low-budget Cannon contract. Golan: "Why should an electrician be flying first class on a film with a small budget? We are eating sandwiches at the office, not going out on the business lunches." And so they devised a contract with the unions that insured protections, but made both sides admit that all Hollywood budgets are not created equally. Golan and Globus devised a system of VHS distribution and theater ownership that ensured their films would always have an outlet, and would (almost) always make their money back, no matter how poor the word-of-mouth or how outré the director. LOVE STREAMS, SALSA, TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE 2, PUSS IN BOOTS, POWAQQATSI and BLOODSPORT are not targeting the same audience– but, hey– theoretically, the same person might accidentally rent all of them!

In all, it was a fantastic evening. I got to shake Golan's hand whilst clad in a Cannon t-shirt. I got to see a surprise appearance by Catherine Mary Stewart (Bibi in THE APPLE, THE LAST STARFIGHTER, WEEKEND AT BERNIE'S). I was furnished with BIM marks and complementary beverages. And I got to see two Herculean figures of cinema reunited, and in conversation. This is about as good as it gets, ladies and gentlemen. Writing this, even a week or so later has got me excited all over again. Now I'm gonna go home, pull down a well-loved Cannon VHS from the shelf, and have myself one helluva evening. God bless Golan and Globus.

-Sean Gill

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