Film Review: THE BIG EASY (1986, Jim McBride)

Stars: 3.5 of 5.

Running Time:  minutes.

Notable Cast or Crew:  Dennis Quaid (ENEMY MINE, FAR FROM HEAVEN), Ellen Barkin (DOWN BY LAW, THE ADVENTURES OF BUCKAROO BANZAI), John Goodman (BARTON FINK, THE BIG LEBOWSKI), Ned Beatty (SUPERMAN, DELIVERANCE), Grace Zabriskie (TWIN PEAKS, WILD AT HEART), Marc Lawrence (MARATHON MAN, THE MAN WITH THE GOLDEN GUN), Soloman Burke (Rock n' Roll Hall of Famer and "The Bishop of Soul").  Written by Daniel Petrie, Jr. (BEVERLY HILLS COP, TURNER & HOOCH).

Tag-line:  "Police ACTION at its best!"  (If ya know what I mean.)

Best one-liner:  "If I can't have you, can I have my gator?"

Sweet crawdad-lickin', bayou-sweatin', gator-chompin' lordy o mine!  It's time to kick off this three part series of Southern-Fried Sleaze-O-Rama!

What? You may be thinking.  THE BIG EASY is a fairly respected, medium-to-high-budgeted 80s Neo-Noir classic, or at least a near-classic.  It's got a respectable acting pedigree, Ebert loved the hell out of it, and for as much as we use the AFI for anything other than the occasional snide remark, they shortlisted this flick for their "Greatest American Mysteries" list and for their "Greatest American Love Stories" list.  So what are you thinking, placing this crawdad-lickin' gem in your series dedicated to unintentional camp and hilarious perversity?

Well, as much as I genuinely enjoy THE BIG EASY, I must spring something on you.  A pop quiz, to be exact.  Don't worry, though– there's only one question.  I want you to think hard, and tell me what the answer is, because honestly, I don't even know.  The question is this:

Q:  What is the most unexpectedly bizarre moment of Mardi Grassin', cajun-spicin' wackadoodle to appear in THE BIG EASY?

Is it, A:  Ned Beatty's spectacular get-up during a front-porchin' Crescent City shindig,

which includes a rather chic felt crawdad hat, a pair of suspenders, and a Tabasco™ sauce tee-shirt, which proudly (and accurately) labels Beatty as "HOT STUFF."

Is it, B:  Grace Zabriskie's bug-eyed, Creole-accented turn as Dennis Quaid's mother,

a matriarch so fierce that she can demolish old ladies with a soul-blasting Medusa glare:

It's a performance which probably inspired David Lynch, who would later cast her in WILD AT HEART as an accented hitwoman carrying out a job in New Orleans.

Is it, C:  John Goodman, looking nowhere near "skinny," but certainly younger and svelter than I've seen him this side of C.H.U.D.

Hint: it's not C.  C is pretty normal.

Is it, D:  The comically disturbing semi-implied, semi-explicit salad-tossing scene between Dennis Quaid and Ellen Barkin



which nearly made me spray my beer through my nose.  (And don't you worry, this series with make an extremely tasteful recurring motif of this particular proclivity.)  I feel as if this demands a new euphemism.  "The Bayou Tosser?"  "Mason Licksin'?"  "Jambalaya Jammin'?"


Is it, E:  Jambalaya Jammin'.  Nevermind, nevermind, THIS is "Jambalaya Jammin'":


Or, as longtime goosing aficionado Burt Reynolds might call it, "The Stroker Ace."

Or is it, F:  Dennis Quaid going undercover and on the lam as notable "Hall and Oates" member,  John Oates.

John Oates heartily approves.

And you really must watch the following clip, which truly functions best when viewed entirely out of context:

So there you have it– I have posed the question.  I pray that you, my valued readers, can provide me with the answer.  So here's hopin' you beat the heat, and stay tuned for more crawdad-lickin', Southern-fried Sleaze-o-rama!

–Sean Gill

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Only now does it occur to me... ENEMY MINE

Only now does it occur to me...  that ENEMY MINE is one of the great, largely unsung 1980s science fiction flicks.

Let me give you the rundown– as a kind of brilliant combination of ROBINSON CRUSOE ON MARS and THE DEFIANT ONES, ENEMY MINE has got all the requirements for solid 80s sci-fi:

#1.  Critters.


Courtesy of the creature shop of FX legend Chris Walas (GREMLINS, THE FLY, DRAGONSLAYER, ARACHNOPHOBIA, SCANNERS).  Pictured above is a kind of Sarlaac-y thing that nearly devours Dennis Quaid, but Walas' finest work is on the Draconians, the lead alien species in the film

(demonstrated here by the always fantastic Lou Gossett, Jr.), whose pulsating nodules and detailed reptilian skin is a testament to the genius of practical effects and the patience of actors.

Also, as more Draconians appear throughout the film, I realized that the species was obviously a trial run for Walas' work on the Mugwumps six years later in David Cronenberg's NAKED LUNCH:



#2.  Heart.

Though marketed to a younger, thrill-seeking demographic, ENEMY MINE is a thoughtful rumination on a number of subjects, including racial and religious tolerance, the rigidity of gender roles, war profiteering, and institutionalized hate.  Like Peterson's prior THE NEVERENDING STORY– which trumpeted the power of imagination in a period of rank consumerism– ENEMY MINE has a big heart, and it's in the right place, too.  I was about to ask why this film isn't more widely known, and I think I just answered my own question.

#3. Dennis Quaid with a beard.

Like Kurt Russell, he's one of the rare actors who fits his beard like a glove.  Which just gave me the wild thought that this could have easily worked as a Kurt Russell vehicle with Keith David as the Draconian.

#4.  Brion James.

 'Cause it's just not a sci-fi actioner without him.  Playing a savage slaver/bandit kingpin, he's directly responsible for more than 90% of the crazy-eye in ENEMY MINE.


 James menaces Dennis Quaid.

Above, he's even 'replicating' (pun intended, I suppose) the pose and delivery of the famous "Wake up, time to die" scene in BLADE RUNNER:

James menaces Harrison Ford.

And though this film is more intellectual than the usual mainstream genre fare, it still manages to embrace the subtle joys of, say, Brion James dangling a child from a cyberpunky catwalk above a stream of lava, or whatever.

Also, Brion James probably should have been in TERMINATOR 2.

 Anyway, I suppose my point is this:  come for the social commentary, stay for the Brion James.

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