Film Review: FRIGHT NIGHT (1985, Tom Holland)

Stars: 4.5 of 5.
Running Time: 106 minutes.
Notable Cast or Crew: Chris Sarandon (CHILD'S PLAY, THE RESURRECTED, DOG DAY AFTERNOON), William Ragsdale (HERMAN'S HEAD, FRIGHT NIGHT 2), Amanda Bearse (MARRIED WITH CHILDREN, THE DOOM GENERATION), Roddy McDowall (PLANET OF THE APES, CLEOPATRA, "The Bookworm" on 60s TV BATMAN), Stephen Geoffreys (976-EVIL, AT CLOSE RANGE), Jonathan Stark (HOUSE II: THE SECOND STORY, PROJECT X). Music by Brad Fiedel (THE TERMINATOR, TERMINATOR 2). Cinematography by Jan Kiesser (SOME KIND OF WONDERFUL, V.I. WARSHAWSKI). Casting by Jackie Burch (DIE HARD, PREDATOR, THE BREAKFAST CLUB).
Tag-line: "If you love being scared, it'll be the night of your life."
Best one-liner: "Welcome to Fright Night! For real."

Good 'ole FRIGHT NIGHT. One of the seminal 80s classicks, it marked the directorial debut of fun-luvin' horror master Todd Holland (CHILD'S PLAY, TALES FROM THE CRYPT, THINNER). Sort of a wonderful cross between 'SALEM'S LOT and REAR WINDOW, FRIGHT NIGHT is a loving paean to Late-Nite-TV monster movie programming and the kids who loved watching it, a proto-'BURBS which unmasks your local neighborhood as a hotbed of bloodshed and other terrifying happenings. Without further adieu, my favorite things about FRIGHT NIGHT:

#1. The Bradbury-esque, small-town-in-Autumn atmosphere.

I'm a sucker for this specific aesthetic every time it crops up, from HALLOWEEN (yes, I know it was actually filmed in the springtime) to SLEEPY HOLLOW to PHANTASM to THE STEPFATHER to THE MONSTER SQUAD to IN THE MOUTH OF MADNESS. Hell, even ERNEST SCARED STUPID benefits from its presence. Autumn's always been my favorite time of year, and something about the stiff suburban breezes blowing fall leaves, the bedroom curtains billowing in the crisp, night air... a comforting, small-town milieu with just a whisper of menace. Basically, if a film can make me feel one tenth as immersed as I am while reading SOMETHING WICKED THIS WAY COMES then it's pretty damn successful.

#2. Jonathan Stark. We've seen him in HOUSE II: THE SECOND STORY. We've seen him as a bartender who nearly steals Sam's job in the sixth season of CHEERS. But here, as a totally assholish Renfield-type, we have the finest performance of his career.

His dickery knows no bounds ("Well, what do we have here? Vampire-killers?"), and he plays the whole thing like a totally committed 80s high school villain, a perpetual, open-mouthed 'Oh yeaaaaaah?' snarfy grin etched across his face. He's the perfect sidekick for Chris Sarandon, whose legendary performance shall be discussed just a little bit later.

#3. The FX people had a helluva lot of fun.

It's pehaps only rivaled by EVIL DEAD in terms of the love, dedication, and sheer enjoyment that the FX guys clearly poured into every ladle of blood, outpouring of slime, and various creatures and makeup effects.

#4. The music. From the Tangerine Dream-RISKY BUSINESS-style seduction scene rhythms to the guitar and reverb-heavy drum riffs, Brad Fiedel's work firmly entrenches us in the here and now, those glorious, glorious 80s.

#5. Evil Ed.

Played by Stephen Geoffreys, Evil Ed is simultaneously hilarious, tragic, and covered occasionally in varying degrees of latex, fur, and fangs. He brings a great deal to a role which could have easily been a phoned-in "zany friend." Geoffreys has been nominated for a Tony award, starred in Robert Englund's directorial debut (976-EVIL), and inspired the title of a Swedish 90's horror comedy. Also, he apparently retired from traditional acting for nearly twenty-odd-years to star in gay porn, including such evocatively titled fare as LATIN CROTCH ROCKETS and LEATHER BUDDIES. I'll let that all sink in for a minute.

#6. The surprising, nuanced, incredible pathos of Roddy McDowell.

I suppose it shouldn't come as a surprise, per se, but in a horror flick with darkly comedic underpinnings, I guess you're not expecting Roddy to be swinging for the heart-wrenchin' fences. As a washed-up late-nite TV host and former horror legend, he plumbs the depths of being fired from his job (lamenting the new era of hockey-masked killers) and being desperate enough to humor and then take the money of teenagers. But it all somehow culminates in the scene pictured above, whereupon Roddy sees the humanity in a death throes of what ostensibly is a monster. Somehow an entire career of pretending to slay creatures of the night on screens both big and small tumbles down in the welling of tears, in the the harsh, visceral, cruel actuality of it all. Later, Chris Sarandon's vampire dickishly quips, "Welcome to Fright Night! For real," and it's hilarious, but here, we're subjected to the exact same sentiment but sprinkled with this unexpected air of despondency. It's great.

#7.

The little girl (pictured nearly all the way to the left) cutting a mean rug at the late-nite club. Were they not checking ID that night? I don't believe it's meant to be a gag because we only ever see her within the crowd in a long shot. Were they that low on extras? Was she the gaffer's niece or something? These are questions that I fear may never be answered.

#8. Through the window.... THREE TIMES!


At one point, Chris Sarandon leaps through a window. Yes, this is something that happens, and this is something that I applaud. I also applaud the fact that Holland shows it to us three times, and from different angles. I love this movie.

#9. And now for a tribute to Chris Sarandon in FRIGHT NIGHT, one of the most spectacularly douche-ified villains to ever grace the silver screen.

CHRIS SARANDON IS HITTING ON YOUR MOM


CHRIS SARANDON IS OWNING THE DANCE FLOOR IN THIS SWEATSHIRT


CHRIS SARANDON IS STEALING YOUR GIRLFRIEND AND PREVENTING YOU FROM HAVING A GOOD TIME


CHRIS SARANDON IS KILLING ALL THE BOUNCERS


CHRIS SARANDON IS WEARING A TURTLENECK NOW AND HE KNOWS WHERE YOU LIVE


OH YES, HE DOES

The exquisite douchery of Chris Sarandon in this movie ought to be enshrined as a national treasure. If he's importing big-city hookers and cultivating an art collection and preying on the populace, why the hell did he move to the suburbs? More importantly, who cares?!

GOTCHA

Like Jonathan Stark, he too occasionally plays it like a high school bully. After a miniature showdown with his kiddie nemesis he seeks revenge by... destroying his automobile!

He chortles, he snickers, he exudes conceit. A raised eyebrow, a superior pursing of the lips, a disdainful leer. He's got a smoove 80s walk and a way with the ladies. He smugly whistles to himself and somehow makes even the act of eating an apple an exercise in self-congratulation. He makes dancefloor moves to a song which is apparently titled "I Fight the Chemistry," because that's what the singer keeps repeating. He seduces/nearly rapes an underage gal to the schwingin' tones of a sleazy saxophone.

Oh boy. He's droppin' a douchebomb on this town, and there may be no survivors. The effect is only amplified when he's alongside Jonathan Stark.


There shoulda been a prequel chronicling these two buddies' zany, condescending misadventures. I would pay good money for that.

Anyway, my point is– if you haven't seen FRIGHT NIGHT, don't be so sad that Halloween has passed. Autumn's still got a solid month left, and Thanksgiving be damned!

–Sean Gill

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Film Review: CHILD'S PLAY (1988, Tom Holland)

Stars: 4 of 5.
Running Time: 87 minutes.
Notable Cast or Crew: Brad Dourif (ONE FLEW OVER THE CUCKOO'S NEST, WISE BLOOD, DEADWOOD, SPONTANEOUS COMBUSTION), Chris Sarandon (FRIGHT NIGHT, THE RESURRECTED, DOG DAY AFTERNOON), Catherine Hicks (STAR TREK IV, PEGGY SUE GOT MARRIED), Alex Vincent (CHILD'S PLAY II, MY FAMILY TREASURE). Music by Joe Renzetti (THE BUDDY HOLLY STORY, DEAD & BURIED). Written by Don Mancini (CELLAR DWELLER, all the CHUCKY movies). Cinematography by Bill Butler (JAWS, GREASE, ROCKY III). Chucky designed by Kevin Yagher (TALES FROM THE CRYPT, NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET 2-4, FACE/OFF). Directed by Tom Holland (FRIGHT NIGHT, FATAL BEAUTY, THINNER, writer of CLASS OF 1984, PSYCHO II, and CLOAK & DAGGER).
Tag-line: "Andy Barclay has a new playmate who's in no mood to play."
Best one-liner: "BATTER UP!" [Brad Dourif cackles]

Maybe you have an affinity for killer dolls. Maybe you're a die-hard Dourif fan. Maybe you're a devotee of Chucky's complex, Miltonian love affair with the word "bitch," a relationship that is only rivaled by Fred Krueger's. Hell, maybe you thought you were seeing the film adaptation of Robert Marasco's Tony-winning CHILD'S PLAY. Nevertheless, you're here- so prepare yourself for a journey in murderous My Buddies and Reaganist ultra-consumerism– it's my top nine things about CHILD'S PLAY!

#1. The movie is sort of like an alternate ending to FATAL BEAUTY. For those not in the know, FATAL BEAUTY is one of the most incredible wisecrackin' cop movies that the 80's had to offer. Also directed by Tom Holland, also starring Brad Dourif as a murderous villain, and also featuring a Dourif vs. good guys showdown in a store. Only this time it's a toy store, and it's not the finale– it's the opening scene!

Do the "Barbie Rockers" in the background make Dourif's death scene more of less powerful? I don't know if I'm qualified to answer that.

Check it out: Dizzy Dizzy Dinosaurs, Mouse Trap, and Fireball Island. The goddamned trifecta of board games that took three hours to set up and were sprinkled with malfunctioning AA battery receptacles and malformed, ill-fitting plastic parts. That doesn't sit so well with Dourif, so he:

And yeah, that's a Little Tykes car... ON FIRE.

#2. The "Good Guys" commercial that's 700 times scarier than the actual Chucky.

What if Dourif just donned that grotesque, adult-sized Good Guy costume and began terrorizing everyone? I'd watch that movie, too.

#3. Schweet puppetry and animatronics.

A blend of puppetry, performers in costume, and animatronics, Chucky himself is certainly an achievement in practical special effects. Co-writer of SLEEPY HOLLOW and known for the Cryptkeeper, some Freddy Krueger sequels, and various other horror and sci-fi projects, Kevin Yagher led the Chucky design team, though it featured contributions from Howard Berger (CREEPSHOW 2, HOUSE III, IN THE MOUTH OF MADNESS), Carl Sorensen (TREMORS), Christoper Swift (TERMINATOR 2, JURASSIC PARK), Mark C. Yagher (FACE/OFF, STARSHIP TROOPERS), Rick Lalonde (DARKMAN, MISERY), Ron Pipes (DR. GIGGLES, SIN CITY), Zandra Platzek (GREMLINS 2: THE NEW BATCH, MASTERS OF THE UNIVERSE), and James Kagel (THE THING, DEAD & BURIED, THE ABYSS). The result is alternatingly stilted and fluid (whenever called for by the script) and simultaneously uncanny and hilarious. Bravo!

#4. YOU STUPID BITCH I TEACH YOU TO FUCK WITH ME and Brad Dourif's cackle.

One might assume a general diminishment of the Brad Dourif factor as soon as he's no longer physically "on screen," but his deranged, spirited voice acting imbues Chucky with genuine presence– you feel the bloodthirsty, claustrophobic frustrations of Dourif's Charles Lee Ray, trapped inside the body of a doll: and Dourif's voice-acting bridges the gap and suspends our disbelief. Also, his evil cackle is magnificent.

#5. A nuanced Chris Sarandon performance.

Well, maybe he's not at his best here, but let's face it: the man is never bad.


Chucky attempts a razor-edged Chris Saradon low-blow.

#6. Chucky battles.


Whenever anyone must fight Chucky, there is a certain lightheartedness that can't help but emerge from the horror: I mean, he's a doll. As such, he gets flung about the room on occasion, battered, punched...he bites people with his little doll teeth. I guess this is just the sort of stuff that I enjoy.

#7. The kiddie gets a one-liner!

Just as in NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET 5: THE DREAM CHILD, a kid gets to deliver a crucial one-liner. (In that fine film, it was "School's out, Krueger!") Here, Chucky has been penned inside a fireplace. He turns up the charm, effectuates his best "sad eyes" and says:

Whereupon the kid ruthlessly prepares to fling a match and bellows with élan:


#8. Chucky comes back more times than the Terminator. And exactly like the Terminator.

Seriously, there even comes the point where he's dragging himself on the floor by one arm, his robotic skeleton revealed beneath the charred doll-flesh.

#9. Select scene Chucky commentary. Now, this is one that I only recently discovered with the DVD. Chucky, in character, delivers audio commentary on several crucial scenes. I couldn't tell if it was Brad Dourif or a very skilled impersonator, but regardless Chucky begins exactly as you'd expect: "Killin' this bitch," "Here, I'm toying with her," "at least in 1988 they still made real fuckin' hammers for kids," insane cackling, etc., etc. Then, as the obvious gimmick begins to wear thin, he begins to get slightly existential– he speaks about the difficulties of adjusting to the doll body, how it feels to kill as a human and then as a doll, etc. Ultimately, the fourth wall is broken, and Chucky's conversing in character with one of the producers. A truly great and bizarre addition to the film. I can't help but wish that this practice would become more frequent, at least amongst cult– imagine Robert Englund doing in-character Freddy commentary, or Rutger Hauer as "The Hitcher" for THE HITCHER, or, shit, how 'bout Clu Gulager in character on THE KILLERS! The possibilities are endless.

Four stars.

– Sean Gill

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Film Review: FATAL BEAUTY (1987, Tom Holland)

Stars: 4.6 of 5.
Running Time: 104 minutes.
Notable Cast or Crew: Whoopi Goldberg, Sam Elliott (FROGS, THE BIG LEBOWSKI), Brad Dourif (ONE FLEW OVER THE CUCKOO'S NEST, CHILD'S PLAY), Harris Yulin (CLEAR AND PRESENT DANGER, ST. IVES), Cheech Marin, Mark Pellegrino (Jacob on TV's LOST, MULHOLLAND DR.), James LeGros (DRUGSTORE COWBOY, GUNCRAZY), John P. Ryan (IT'S ALIVE, CLASS OF 1999), M.C. Gainey (Tom Friendy on TV's LOST, SIDEWAYS), Rubén Blades (PREDATOR 2, ONCE UPON A TIME IN MEXICO), Charles Hallahan (Norris in THE THING, SILKWOOD). Music by Harold Faltermeyer (KUFFS, THE RUNNING MAN). Holy shit, the only people missing from this movie are Clu Gulager, Donald Pleasence, and James Remar.
Tag-line: "An earthquake is about to hit L.A. It's called Detective Rita Rizzoli."
Best one-liner: "Do you want a glass?" –"Do I want a glass? No, wrap it in a taco, dumb motherfucker, yes, I want a glass!"

FATAL BEAUTY is an extremely underrated (buddy) cop thriller directed by Tom Holland (CHILD'S PLAY, FRIGHT NIGHT) and written by Hilary Henkin (ROAD HOUSE) and Dean Riesner (DIRTY HARRY). The cast is extremely eclectic and chock full of undersung, prolific 80's character actors, and Whoopi has never been more likable. There's ginormous boom boxes, zany high-heel'd hookers, chubby Latino queens channeling Divine, Cheech Marin as a smarmy bartender ("Gimme a kiss"), and Rubén Blades as a bearded, milquetoast cop who doesn't even know who Richard Gere is (zany, right?).

It's a forgotten film, misplaced in a sea of BEVERLY HILLS COPS, LETHAL WEAPONS, and DIE HARDS. Discarded, derided, and disregarded, this is the sort of thing that Drug Mart puts in the 50-cent bin, then withdraws from circulation entirely 'cause no one is renting it... except me. I am renting it. And then I am proclaiming it to be a "hidden gem" for all the world to hear. So here are thirteen reasons why FATAL BEAUTY deserves its place in the pantheon, beside the likes of THE FRENCH CONNECTION and TURNER & HOOCH:

#1. John P. Ryan (R.I.P.) as the crusty Lieutenant who you love to hate. He drinks Pepto Bismol out of the bottle, smokes a pipe, and is always threatening Whoopi with that old standby– We'll stick you behind a desk if you screw up one more time, you whacky action-luvin' cop! He gets to deliver the classic "Gut feeling! We need probable cause– we can't go down to the D.A.'s office with your gut!" But then he pulls a disappearing trick halfway through the narrative and is never heard from again. It's a thankless job, and John P. Ryan has to do it. And I don't even grace him with a screencap here. That's completely unintentional, but probably an all-too-common theme for the credit owed to John P. Ryan. Lost in the shuffle. IT'S ALIVE? You probably just remember the killer baby. CLASS OF 1999? You can't think of anything but Pam Grier's robot boobs. RENT-A-COP? All you can think of is Liza getting goosed and James Remar dancing up a storm. THREE O'CLOCK HIGH? The bully. DEATH WISH 4? Bronson. WHITE SANDS? Dafoe. And John P. Ryan doesn't even get credited in that one. Where is the love? One of these days, I will devote an entire week to John P. Ryan. But, poetically, I'll probably forget that I ever promised that.

#2. M.C. Gainey and Norris from THE THING (Charles Hallahan) as two sexist cops who Whoopi schools the shit out of.

In fact, that's kind of the set-up for the entire film: A. People offend Whoopi, calling her "bitch," "cunt," or by engaging in illegal activity. B. Whoopi kicks their asses and has a snazzy retort. Case in point: "Kevlar, bitch!" BLAM BLAM BLAM –"Smith & Wesson, asshole!" The retort doesn't even have to be that scathing, it just has to be sassy: "Hey, stay bent over like that and I'll show you a good time." –"Oh yeah? One quick hump and you'd be in the hospital, honey."

#3. Whoopi's style- she's got a cat like Philip Marlowe, drives around in a snazzy pink Mustang (shades of "AWSOM 50" anyone?),

decorates her home with Chuck Berry paintings, shoots dudes in the ass and then tortures them, and whomps a WASPin' country club beyotch into a pool and thru plate glass window.

"Everywhere I go, people are dyin' to meet me." I didn't even get to the scene where she steals cookies from a restaurant before she leaves to abuse a suspect in the meat locker. Yes, she is awesome.

I must admit, in the past I have generally had pretty lukewarm feelings on the subject of Whoopi Goldberg. Now she is a lifetime member of Junta Juleil's Hall-o-Fame.

#4. Rizzoli! I guess Whoopi is an Italian-American. Have-a some more s'getts, you look-a too thin! Whether or not the screenplay was written for a black woman is certainly open to debate, since they definitely run with some of the jokier aspects (in retrospect?). Either way, I love it.

#5. Whoopi's undercover costumes. Whether she's dressed as "Tina Turner meets Golan-Globus crackwhore":

Note sunglasses.

or like a 1960's housewife-slash-debutante:

her many disguises are guaranteed to delight and inspire.

#6. Mark Pellegrino as Billy Idol-lookin' punk named Frankenstein. Compare it to his character in DEATH WISH 4. It really puts a whole new spin on LOST. (And one scene in particular even eerily anticipates the Season 5 finale.) In fact, wait a minute- this movie is full of LOST alumni (M.C. Gainey, Cheech Marin). The wheels are turning.

Note the black and white imagery.

#7. The guy who chews on a glass bottle for no reason. Hey, Busey lit his arm on fire in LETHAL WEAPON, so why not.

#8. Whiny James LeGros. He's the first of two characters to drop the C-bomb on Whoopi (Dourif being the other) and is referred to as a "snot nosed limp dick in designer jeans."

LeGros prepares to drop the c-bomb with little to no warning.

Don't worry, though, the country club douchebomb who Whoopi whoops with such commitment and élan... is his mom.



#9. Sam Elliott. So soothing.

Seriously, though, he and Werner Herzog should team up and do a radio show. The show could air from, I don't know, maybe 7-10 AM EST on weekdays, and I could set my clock radio to it, and that way I could bestir myself to something other than "Time keeps on slippin' slippin' slippin'...into the future..." which I guess is soothing in its own way, but it feels very old hat to me at this point in my life but I guess it's my own fault for having the dial tuned to a classic rock station only plays about five or six different songs. I digress. Regardless, Sam Elliot says, "I always had a thing for Italian ladies." Ro-mannnce!

#10. The eponymous cocaine blend which will kill you or drive you crazy in thirty seconds. WHATTT?! What a great plot development! It's so over-the-top and with such high stakes, that I have to say we're nearly in DEAD HEAT territory.

#11. Brad Dourif. Cast (in a pre-Chucky Tom Holland flick!) as the main villain, it doesn't matter if he's in silk shirts, ridic 80's wool sport coats or weird little red shoes- his frizzy hair is in that classic lopsided part, and he's skittering around like he's king of the drug world.


He's surprisingly earnest, too. Well, at least before he starts killing everybody. We're entreated to the sight of Dourif blasting automatic weapons and shooting up innocent bystanders and security guards at a mall, which is strangely similar to the opening scene of CHILD'S PLAY- in fact, in addition to thinking of it as a second parallel universe on LOST, I'm going to start considering FATAL BEAUTY as a prequel to the Chucky movies. Hey, they both use the word "bitch" a lot.

#12. Harris Yulin. Always typecast as this sort of character. Always great at it. Lather, rinse, repeat.

Is that a terrycloth smoking jacket or an especially dignified robe?

#13. The ending that may or may not involve a mustache kiss and a freeze frame, and the closing credits song "It's Criminal" by Shannon. "It's crim-in-nal. I THINK IT'S A CRIME! It's crim-in-nal. DOIN' TIME!"

-Sean Gill

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